Embracing Imperfections: Becoming Flawesome

Author

Sasha Baldeosingh, MSc. Mental Health Therapist at Lifelong Living Counselling Services

Perfectionism...it's a trap many of us fall into. If you've ever found yourself chasing that elusive ideal, surrounded by that constant inner critic buzz of "not good enough", this blog post we'll be exploring practical strategies to manage those perfection thoughts and discover how to embrace our imperfections. Click to read more.

We all fall into this trap now and again. I know I have! (Hello, my name is Sasha, and I am a recovering perfectionist). Many times my perfectionism used to (and let me be honest, sometimes still) immobilize me. I'd go over something a million times and avoid things on that fear of not being "good enough." Yep! Even therapists aren't immune to that perfectionism monster!

It's easy to fall into that trap of feeling like we need to be "perfect." And let's pause and think of what we're surrounded by. We see images of seemingly flawless people on social media or television and hear stories of these grand successes. But, here's the truth that many of us already know: perfection is an illusion. No one is perfect, and that is where the beauty of our world comes from. 

Yeah, yeah, that's all great and dandy, but how do we get through this desire for perfection and embrace imperfections? Let's get into some practices and strategies that you can delve into right now:

1. Self-compassion 
Why are we our own worst critics? (Well there is a science-y reason why, but I'll leave that for another post). I understand deeply how difficult self-compassion can be; however, practicing self-compassion is literally (yes, literally) life-changing. When we make mistakes or fall short of our own expectations, it's so easy to be hard on ourselves. But practicing self-compassion means treating ourselves with the same kindness and understanding we would offer to someone we love (or if you don't love anyone, the same kindness and understanding you would offer to a puppy or kitten). Making mistakes is a natural part of the human experience, and it never means we are any less worthy of love and respect. 

2. Reframe your mindset
Mindset is the way we see things, perceive things, and respond to things. Instead of focusing on what you perceive as your flaws or weaknesses, try shifting that mindset to focus on challenges you've overcome, things that you have received compliments on, achievements (no matter how big or small). When your mind is yelling at you about a mistake or a flaw, don't just allow it. Thank your mind for it's input, and clearly state back FACTS. You have a lot to bring to the world. But if you spend all your time focusing on the flaws or mistakes, you're not going to be able to see it.  

3. Learn the magic of letting go
I hope I have not brought back any earworms of a certain song, but learning the skill of letting go with love, respect, and compassion is a major skill to pack in your toolbox of wellness. Holding on to past mistakes or regrets happens can become weights we drag around with us tiring us out and making us move slower. Practice letting go of things you cannot change, and focus instead on the things you can do to grow moving forward. 

4. Surround yourself with uplifting knowledge and good vibes
When we surround ourselves with things that lift us up instead of bring us down, it opens up that safe space of embracing imperfections and feeling good. Seek out books and videos that talk deeply and truthfully about these topics. Seek out people who uplift you and who are balanced in talking about the good and the bad. Minimize time spent with people and in situations that bring your down and mainly focus on the bad. 

It's ok to be imperfect. It's awesome actually since they are part of what makes us who we are. Embracing our imperfections can be a powerful tool for building your confidence, having healthier relationships, self-esteem, and living a fulfilling and meaningful life. 
So let's all together now, take a deep breath in, and with the exhale let go of the pressure to be perfect, and embrace all the unique and wonderful things that make you who you are. 

Photo by Jason Leung on Unsplash

Please note that the information provided in this post is not intended to serve as a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical or mental health condition.